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  • John Belvedere

True Self VS Fleeting Desires: A Deep Dive into Authentically Shaping Your Life Goals

Have you ever lain awake at night, wrestling with the question, "Am I truly chasing what I want in life?" Understanding who we want to be transcends mere goal-setting; it's a deep dive into our innermost aspirations and life's purpose. In this video, we delve into how to uncover your authentic desires and transform them into meaningful and achievable goals.

Peeling Back the Layers

The journey to discovering who you want to be starts with understanding who you are at your core. Consider how you organize a cluttered room. You sift through everything, sorting out what’s essential and what's not. Likewise, introspecting about our beliefs, experiences, and values helps in identifying what truly matters to us. Embark on this journey of self-discovery through journaling. Contemplate questions like, "What activities make me lose track of time?" or "In what instances have I felt most proud of myself?" Such reflections can unearth patterns revealing your true passions and values.

Vision Versus Fantasy

It's crucial to distinguish between momentary desires and enduring aspirations. Think of it like planning a holiday. You might fantasize about a serene beach getaway, but if your heart thrives on adventure and exploration, how long would the tranquility keep you satisfied? Understand the difference between a temporary yearning and a dream that resonates with your true self. Scrutinize your goals through the lens of your lifestyle. Question if realizing these dreams will genuinely enhance your life in the long run. Viktor Frankl, a renowned psychologist, emphasized that finding personal meaning in our goals leads to more enriching and satisfying life achievements.

Charting Your Course

Identifying your end goal is just the beginning; the next step is to map out a viable path to reach it. For instance, if your ambition is to become a writer, you wouldn’t simply sit back and wait for inspiration. You’d start by establishing small, manageable goals like writing a page a day or enrolling in a writing workshop. Decompose your ultimate aim into smaller, achievable objectives. Celebrate minor accomplishments along the way; these small wins are the milestones marking your journey towards your dream.

Embracing the Journey

Realize that finding who you want to be is an evolving journey, not a one-time decision. Just like how a river's course might change, but it still flows towards the ocean, your path to self-discovery might shift, but your ultimate destination remains constant. Embrace the twists and turns; they’re part of your unique story. Stay flexible and open to new experiences. Sometimes, the most unexpected paths can lead to the most fulfilling destinations. Keep reassessing and realigning your goals as you grow and learn more about yourself.

Challenge yourself with the '5 Whys' technique for the next month. Every time you set a goal, ask 'why' five times to delve deep into your true motivations. This can help you understand whether your goal truly aligns with your inner self or if it's influenced by external factors. We're all on this self-discovery journey together, so share your experiences and breakthroughs in the comments!


We've navigated through techniques to peel back layers of external influences, differentiate between short-lived desires and long-term aspirations, chart practical steps towards our goals, and understand the importance of embracing the evolving journey of self-discovery. Thank you for spending this time with me, exploring the pathways to our true selves. Your dedication to self-improvement is remarkable.

Remember, discovering who you want to be is a journey filled with discovery, introspection, and sometimes, re-invention. Keep pushing forward, stay true to yourself, and let every step you take be a piece in the puzzle of your life. Until next time, keep exploring, dreaming, and growing!

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